Lib Dems push for two-tier UK/EU citizenship

The Europhile Liberal Democrats have backed suggestions by European federalist Guy Verfohstaft that bitter Remoaners should be given the chance to apply for “associate citizenship” of the crumbling European Union – allowing them to vote in European Parliament elections and for some form of open borders to remain.

Foreign Affairs spokesman for the party, MP Tom Brake, said that the move could “offer a glimmer of hope for all those who were devastated” by the news that Britain would soon free itself from the tyrannical grip of Brussels.

Failing to grasp that the move is an obvious ploy to undermine the integrity of the United Kingdom and instil split loyalties in her citizens, Brake naively added that “the fact this idea is even being discussed shows there remains a huge amount of goodwill towards Britain amongst our European partners”.

But as is so often the case, the Liberal Democrats remain entirely impotent to secure their tired vision for the future. Downing Street shut down the suggestions, telling reporters that it is “not something that we have ever proposed or said that we are looking at”.

The LibDems are seeking to divide the country when we voted together for Brexit.