Is this Britain's biggest Remoaner?

Former university lecturer William Riches has declared independence from Britain and turned his Severnside home into a republic because he wants to retain EU membership.

The Europhile has appointed his wife President while granting citizenship rights to his children and grandchildren, but he warns that future visitors may have to fork out £50 for a visa once Britain leaves the EU.

When asked why he opposes Brexit, the retired academic repeated the usual empty platitudes, attacking national sovereignty. He asked “why the older generation voted against their children” and claimed that he “cannot see a future for this country now”.

But the President of the new Independent Republic of Middlewatch is realistic about the futility of the gesture, admitting that she lives in a Remoaner bubble: “I don’t think the notice will change any minds because our friends and neighbours voted Remain anyway, but it’s our way of making a protest and people who come here often apologise for not bringing their passports.”

Maybe if Mr and Mrs Riches kept a wider social circle they would understand the reasons why 17.4 million decent patriotic Brits voted to quit the EU.