Whilst Westmonster doesn't espouse the use of violence to achieve its goals, we can't help but think that the recent incident involving the beating of Labour MP Anne Moffat will make her think more carefully regarding the way that she votes on, or deals with, issues of crime in the… read more…

Westmonster is excited to announce that Liberal Democrat MP Lembit Opik is engaged to his girlfriend, Cheeky Girl Gabriela Irima. We hope that our readers feel the same sense of awe and bewilderment as we do. The couple, who reportedly met at a Convention for Lop-sided Smilers in 2006,… read more…

Is it us, or does Christmas come earlier every year? News has fallen off a cliff in the last 48 hours since the terrific excitement of Cleggers' election. And yes, we are including the announcement of the Cleggers "front bench team" (actually front-bench-and-a-bit-off-to-the-side team). BONG! He might not believe in… read more…

BONG! More trouble for Ian Blair as news filters through that his hypothetical resignation would not be accepted, in advance of another report on the Stockwell shooting. BONG! David Cameron's apparent love of gas-guzzling, environmentally unfriendly, carbon footprint-creating, large, posh vehicles to follow him around as he delivers lectures on how… read more…

BONG! The Tories have written to Jacqui Smith demanding she yield unto them the head of Ian Blair. Preferably on a spike. BONG! The day after the Election that Wasn't, Political Betting ponders if the situation might have gone the other way for Davy had the Observer published their poll… read more…

BONG! In his evidence to the Public Accounts Committee, Yates of the Yard explains he was a "political problem" for Downing Street (curious, we always thought he'd be welcomed with open arms), and Guido gets excited as his Pledge Bank coffers swell. BONG! American men! Do you not do The Sex… read more…

It was a boring Monday in Parliament. MPs dozed happily on the green benches during Home Office questions, whilst hacks and bloggers lazily looked around for something to write about. A dull day like any other until... ...at 6pm the Sports and Social ran out of Spitfire! Oh, and whatshisname who… read more…

BONG! In the wake of the Gord signing up to the EU Treaty, opinion on the blogosphere is divided. Grimmer up North is irritated that the promise of a referendum was a manifesto promise as opposed to an actual commitment, whilst Mike Ion reckons not. BONG! The Norfolk Blogger on the ITV phone-in scandal. We… read more…

Hear that bang? It was Lembit Opik breaking the sound barrier so he could appear in Central Lobby in front of a BBC TV camera. We're being treated to a wigging from Lembit about ageism but he doesn't really have much else to add apart from an appeal to the… read more…

BONG! Ming Campbell's troubles begin in earnest as questions are asked over his leadership. In, er, unrelated news, Cheeky Boy Lembit steps down as leader of the Welsh Liberal Democrats. Coincidence? Westmonster has reason to suspect not. BONG! Is there an end in sight for the postal strike? BONG! Kelvin… read more…

Westmonster thinks that it is fair to say that the lobby were unimpressed with Gord's performance at PMQs yesterday, with bears (baiting thereof) being the metaphor of choice. The Times has Brown as a grizzly, the Independent chooses a brown bear, Simon Hoggart in the Guardian merely goes for… read more…

The newshounds at Auntie are hot on the story of the new ruling that dictates that House of Commons staffers have to genuflect before Members of Parliament as they push past us in the queue. Apparently, our champions in this matter are the Liberal Democrats' resident Cheeky Boy Lembit Opik… read more…