Westmonster: “John Prescott”

Ministry for Devolution

Cherie Blair to open literary festival...

Sexy literary genius Cherie Blair is set to take the book publishing world by storm as she prepares to make a special guest appearance at West Yorkshire's Ilkley Literature Festival. The wife of former PM Tony Blair will officially open the event before giving lucky punters an exclusive insight into… read more…
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Ministry for Taste and Decency

Prescott to front ambitious documentary...

Fans of secretly sensitive John Prescott will be delighted to hear that he is to front a BBC documentary that explores the British class system. Titled Prescott On Class the autumn season highlight has been described (by producers) as "BBC2's most ambitious single documentary ever". Even more excitingly, the show… read more…
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Department for Diffrunt People

John Prescott all upset that he don't speak too good

It's hard to maintain levels of literacy and articulation in this modern world of ours. Literally everything is being slang-warped and abbreviated, to the point where Westmonster fears an entire new generation of whippersnappers will grow up to carry out their wedding vows in Textspeak and deliver funeral eulogies… read more…
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Ministry for Bleak Outlooks

The lights are on but no one's home...

Despite earlier reports that he might be going somewhere, Gordon Brown has managed to instill a sense of fear and confusion into the minds of the masses by revealing that he is planning something called a 'two-year fight back campaign'. The long and short of it will be that he… read more…
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Meedja on the Insanity Pills

Prescott not a fan of Brown either...

John Prescott has revealed that he asked Tony Blair to sack the current PM whilst he was nought but a mere chancellor. ePolitix. Gordon Brown has sworn to make social care for the elderly 'fairer'. BBC. Companies may soon start using lie detectors when employees call in sick. The Sun.… read more…
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Roundup

John Prescott revelation: media roundup

Chances are you'll have heard by now: former Deputy PM John Prescott has revealed that his time in the Blair government was overshadowed by his battle with bulimia. A remarkable admission by many accounts, and - given the self-promoting, PR-driven dirge that most politicians reel out on a daily… read more…
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Department for Tax and Spend

Prescott's taxpayer banquet

We've already witnessed a lot of controversy over MP's spending and allowances these last few months, and - with the introduction of a Freedom Of Information order - it looks like we're going to be seeing a lot more. Details are seeping out further, and allowing the public a… read more…
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News From The Big Tent

No Prescott dynasty in Hull

John Prescott's son David won't be following his Dad into the Commons as Hull East MP: The son of the former deputy prime minister John Prescott failed last night in an attempt to replace his father in the Commons when he stands down at the next general election. David Prescott,… read more…
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