Boris Johnson's crime proposals have some serious stuff in them, of course, but you don't want to hear about that, do you? You want to hear about Boris mucking up the running order at his launch (and referring to David Davis as The Home Secretary). You also want to hear… read more…

"Hello, I'm here from your local Labour Party. Have you got time to answer five, quick questions or do you just want to cut to the chase and shout at me for five minutes about "sleaze" as if I were the last outpost of David Abrahams' office in London, a harangue… read more…

Big Issue founder John Bird announced he would step down from the London mayoral race, it was announced yesterday. Speaking exclusively to Westmonster, Mr Bird said that he had "considered whooping Ken's ass and would definitely had won had he chosen to," but was reluctant to actually become a politician.… read more…

It knackers Lord Ashcroft's key seats strategy: The Tories have spent the last couple of years stuffing crisp tenners into the G-strings of their candidates in the chosen marginals, but as soon as the election is called legislation governing spending kicks in, ending these shenanigans. The longer Gord leaves it,… read more…

Whilst Dave Cameron is trying on the chains of office to see whether they're his size, will Samantha be measuring up for new curtains in Number 10?… read more…

So, Tony Benn wants to be selected for the unwinnable Conservative seat of Kensington. What that man will never cease to do to bolster his own self-importance, er, represent the cause of the common people, eh? Last week came the news that some seventeen year old - who just happened to… read more…

Well boys and girls, it looks like we're on, don't it? Not that Westmonster knows anything more than anybody else, but it seems that Gord and Cameron have ratcheted up the ante to such an extent that if Brown backs out now, he'll give the impression of being scared of… read more…

There's a story over at Iain Dale's about how Alex Salmond is considering standing against the Gord, should he call a snap election. Iain's unsure as to whether this is an advisable course of action, as it might undermine the standing of a "serious statesman" and is a tactic more suited… read more…