Crime rates are expected to soar as the economy deteriorates. The Guardian. Gordon Brown and Alistair Darling have decided that England should borrow its way out of the economic crisis. The Times. Al Gore has challenged Americans to give up fossil fuels within the next ten years. BBC. Plans for… read more…

The U.S. looks like it has plans to establish a diplomatic presence in Iran sometime within the next month. BBC. Official figures suggest that incidents of knife crime in the UK over the last year have topped 22,000. The Telegraph. Whitehall has announced that it is to be the first… read more…

David Cameron has called for U.S. style bankruptcy rules in a bid to protect the economy. The Times. US car firm General Motors has revealed that it is to cut jobs due to decreased sales. BBC. It looks like knife crime may not be just an English avocation but one… read more…

Gordon Brown is to vacation in the English town of Southwold in Suffolk. Channel 4. Tony Blair is to visit Gaza for the first time in his new role as Middle East envoy. BBC. Jacqui Smith is wishing she had never said anything about knife offenders visiting people in A&E… read more…

The death rate after major surgery within NHS hospitals is three times as high as it should be. The Telegraph. David Davis won his by-election with a huge majority of 15,355 - maybe it would have been easier if he'd just moved office or something. BBC. Nick Clegg has been… read more…

Gordon Brown has insisted that he has much in common with Heathcliff from Wuthering Heights. The Guardian. Today apparently marks the 50th anniversary of the beloved parking meter. The Times. Ministers are to bribe people out of their apathy when it comes to local elections by offering them the chance… read more…

Iran has test-fired its longest range missile - capable of hitting Israel - as a warning to the U.S. BBC. The Vatican isn't too happy with the Church of England's decision to allow women to be bishops. The Times. A new report has determined that errors within the benefits system… read more…

David Cameron has pointed out that modern British values are 'twisted'. The Guardian. Most Labour voters apparently consider Gordon Brown to be a loser. The Times. After the proposed ban, the U.S. government has decided to invest in 'safer' cluster bombs. Channel 4. The government has published a new report… read more…

Hospital staff have had to start wearing stab-proof vests in order to stand a chance of surviving the knife-riddled English night. The Guardian. Labour suffered another bout of confusion over the weekend, this time due to the Scottish by-election. ePolitix. Young people seem to becoming more Conservative in than they… read more…

Gordon Brown has described his job as being the 'best in the world', suggesting that the nervous breakdown we were expecting may not be about to happen. The Guardian. The PM has also hinted that his plans for a 2p rise on fuel duty may be abandoned. The Guardian. The… read more…