Ministry For Transport Trauma
Tony Blair dodges train fare
When one hears the words 'train fare dodger', what mental image immediately springs to mind? The skint student legging it away from the ticket inspector as fast as his backpack will allow? The wily chav, making excellent use of his Burberry cap by sliding it over his eyes and pretending to be asleep? Or the pissed bloke who tries hiding in the toilets ... and fails?
Any one of those, and Westmonster would place you squarely in the 'spot-on' category. If, however, you'd suggested that former PM Tony Blair had been caught short while cruising on the Heathrow Express, we'd have raised a sceptical eyebrow. And then slapped you for being so silly.
Being the honest types we are, though, we'd have instantly retracted that slap (normally against our policy, mind) when you showed us the news.
Yep: it's all true. Blair - whose earnings since leaving Downing Street are estimated to be in the £20 million bracket - was apparently lacking the necessary funds to stump up the £24.50 travel fare. Even more embarrassingly, the cost was reportedly covered by an anonymous donor.
A spokesman for Heathrow Express explained:
“We do not know if he had any money on him or not but one of the people with him paid for his fare.”
The identity of this mystery benefactor is still unknown. Was it one of Blair's weary entourage? Or was it some kind-hearted soul who couldn't bear to see Tony under such duress? Hopefully time will tell. Infact, the Daily Star wants whoever it was to phone their office and speak to them.
Bah! We say speak to Westmonster instead. Face it: if you were to be featured in the Daily Star, it'd probably be in a tiny box-out on Page 3, thereby leading the whole nation to instantly associate you with the chest area of 'Kayleigh, 19, from Durham.' And do you really want that?
Do you?
del.icio.us
digg
Facebook
Newsvine
reddit