Ministry of Useless Information
James Brown is living in America..
American immigration officers may have been more than a little confused when our plucky PM landed on American soil. And not just because they're American.
No, much more excitingly than that, Westmonster has reason to believe that the name written in the PM's passport does not say 'Gordon Brown', as we were maybe expecting, but that of his sex-machine, godfather-of-soul namesake 'James Brown' - the PM's officially registered birth name.
Geettttt uupp!
Our records (read: Google) have shown that 'Gordon' is actually the PM's middle name. We can only assume that he decided to start going by this rather sober sobriquet in order to avoid any damage that his - easily targeted - real name could have done to his career as a politician. Imagine the tabloid headlines, if you dare:
-Halifax defies James Brown and raises rates
-James Brown to confront Wall Street
-James Brown appears on American Idol
It just doesn't seem right. In fact, we must salute Brown's decision-making acumen regarding the matter and put our faith within him as a leader. The only problem that we are able to perceive is the fact that 'Gordon' sounds so much more boring than 'James'. It's far too old-school politician, especially after the years we have served under a 'Tony', which sounds more like a hairdresser or something.
James Gordon Brown is currently on his way to America for a three day trip on which he intends to solve the world's current financial crisis. The Pope is also visiting The States at this time but there have not yet been any reports of him shitting in the woods.
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