David Cameron To Make Econony 'Dynamic'

D-Cam's painting a gloomy old picture of the UK's economic future, saying that we face "financial turmoil in the foreground and, looming in the background, an inexcusable failure to prepare for difficult economic times". Who's the man to sort out this mess? Take a wild guess.

While admitting that there was no such thing as a 'magic pot of money', Cameron's rather vague strategy stretched about as far as to get ''the best and most productive firms to Britain and keep them here". All a little noncommital to say the least, but with the Conservatives 14 points ahead of Labour in a recent YouGov poll, Cameron is clearly doing something that captures the imagination. Experts refer to it as 'not being Gordon Brown.'

If you're on the lookout for a financial tip, by the way, bear in mind that we're due for an election in the next couple of years. Westmonster advises picking up shares in speechwriting, PR, campaign limo hire and glossy leaflet-printing. They're gonna skyrocket, people ...