The Funding Scrolls

Cameron and Clegg: naughty boys

Time for the two opposition leaders to get slapped wrists from the Electoral Commission. Nick Clegg didn't declare 14 grand in cash donations in time (including some from, intriguingly, Ian Wright. Not that Ian Wright, surely?). And David Cameron, aka Caesar's wife, was late to declare a non-cash gift from… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 29 Feb 2008 4:43 PM. Permalink

Meedja on the Insanity Pills

Big up Whitto

John Whittingdale (Toy, Maldon and East Chelmsford) gets a bizarre big-up from Tara Hamilton-Miller this morning for not being a total muppet when it comes to music: Whitto has never missed a Brit Awards. "I was there for all the best bits - Chumbawamba soaking Prescott, Sam Fox, Jarvis. I… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 29 Feb 2008 9:57 AM. There are 2 comments so far. Permalink

Our Friends North of the Border

Harry Palmer to the rescue

David Cameron has taken the logic of unseen Tory politicians to its natural conclusion - he's appointed a former spy, Andrew Fulton, as chairman of the party in Scotland: Last year, Mr Fulton, who lives in Glasgow, became the first former spy to join a listed British company when he… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 29 Feb 2008 8:21 AM. Permalink

Department for Tax and Spend

Has Lansley knackered Osborne?

The Tories are still in a mess over Andrew Lansley's unagreed hospital pass on spending yesterday, with George Osborne talking cuts in other places, explicitly, for the first time: In a speech yesterday the Shadow Chancellor confirmed that health increases would be funded by cuts elsewhere but said that the… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 29 Feb 2008 8:15 AM. There are 1 comments so far. Permalink

Cesspool on the Potomac

Obama a ritmo de mariachi! Olé!

As part of our continuing effort to bring the best of the US Presidential campaign to the UK, Westmonster presents the following video (via Andrew Sullivan). Produced by the people of AmigosDeObama.com, it provides a glimpse into what it may take for the candidate to make inroads into the Latino… read more…

Written by Andrew Levy on 28 Feb 2008 1:59 PM. Permalink

News from the United Federation of Muesli Knitters

Is Clegg turning into Foggy?

The LibDem attitude to the Euro-referendum gets weirder and weirder: Next week, after months of legal argument and political squabbling, Parliament will vote on whether the Lisbon treaty should be put to a referendum. However, Lib Dems have been told to stay away from both the Aye and No lobbies,… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 28 Feb 2008 9:07 AM. Permalink

Department for Waiting Lists

Doctor In The Trough

The National Audit Office's report on GP pay perfectly encapsulates Labour's problem with spending: more GPs, lower productivity, and some spectacular troughing by GP partners: In 2005-06 the annual average pay of a GP partner was £113,614, an increase of 58 per cent since 2002-03. GPs report, however, that over… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 28 Feb 2008 8:59 AM. There are 1 comments so far. Permalink

The Funding Scrolls

Data crackdown reaps dividends

Don't worry, your data is safe. We've sorted it all out, and this story is not something you should remotely be concerned about: A confidential Home Office disk has been discovered inside a laptop by computer technicians, it was revealed last night. Police are investigating the find, which came after… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 28 Feb 2008 8:47 AM. Permalink

News from the Carlton Club

Dave and the "i" word

You knew it was coming. And here it is. The Tory ad campaign that features immigration controls at its heart: Let's hope it goes better than last time they tried this...… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 28 Feb 2008 8:40 AM. Permalink

Meedja on the Insanity Pills

Tories to cut tax. No, wait...

Westmonster is confused. Not 3 weeks ago, the Telegraph headline read "Tories look to tax cuts to help economy." Yet today, in a piece about the Conservatives' plan to raise spending on the NHS at the expense of other services, the Telegraph seems to be saying rather the opposite: "It… read more…

Written by Andrew Levy on 28 Feb 2008 8:32 AM. Permalink

News from the United Federation of Muesli Knitters

Ed's porkies

Is Ed Davey telling a bit of a porkie pie in his note on the Indy's OpenHouse blog? Yesterday, much to my surprise, I found myself being dismissed from the Chamber of the Commons by the Deputy Speaker. This sort of thing doesn’t happen to Liberal Democrats, and I don’t… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 28 Feb 2008 7:53 AM. Permalink

Ministry for Blithering Idiots

Here comes Norm

It's like Spitting Image never went away. Following Michael Gove's recent eulogy on Tony Blair, the Chingford skinhead himself has come out of retirement, taken Gove round the corner and knocked his silly head in: It was Blair who introduced uncontrolled, unmeasured immigration of people determined not to integrate, but… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 27 Feb 2008 9:07 PM. Permalink

Meedja on the Insanity Pills

Sky News - Fair and Balanced

We've been watching Jon Craig become steadily more unhinged on the Boulton and Co. website for a few days now. While Nick Robinson fends off angry accusations of campaigning-style journalism on the national dime, Craig's latest pushes the envelope of comment for a broadcast journalist quite a long way: What… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 27 Feb 2008 9:02 PM. There are 1 comments so far. Permalink

All change please

Could he? Could he really?

Westmonster has always believed that some people will never be elected leader of anything, while some people have it apparent in their DNA. Neil Kinnock was never going to be Prime Minister. Tony Blair always was. John Kerry was never going to be President. And Ken Livingstone was always going… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 27 Feb 2008 7:54 AM. There are 2 comments so far. Permalink

Ministry for Re-Runs

Is abortion set for a comeback?

Tim Montgomerie, the editor and eminence grise of ConservativeHome, has stuck his head well and truly above the abortion debate parapet by posting two anti-abortion videos on ConservativeHome. The apparently rather expensive productions are the work of a new website, Passion For Life, which is spectacularly coy (rather appropriately) abouts… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 26 Feb 2008 4:18 PM. There are 1 comments so far. Permalink

Department for Diffrunt People

The millionth Polish builder cometh

Got some bad numbers? No problem. Bury them in some good ones! Liam Byrne (whom Austin Mitchell yesterday accused of shafting our Anzac wartime allies) plays a blinder with the release of some 2007 immigration numbers today. There are 20 paragraphs in the Home Office release. The first 15 are… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 26 Feb 2008 2:47 PM. Permalink

Cesspool on the Potomac

Oba-meter: February 26th

With the Republican nomination sewn up by John McCain, Westmonster moves its focus to the Democratic competition. We've outlined the 4 things Barack Obama needs to do in order to beat Hillary Clinton — sweep February's post-Super Tuesday contests, make no gaffes, win Ohio or Texas on March 4th, and… read more…

Written by Andrew Levy on 26 Feb 2008 9:48 AM. Permalink

News From The Big Tent

El Gordo's long game

People are talking "the long game" this morning, as the Tory lead over Labour remains stubbornly large. 2010 is looking increasingly like the most plausible election date - ie, as late as possible. One interesting development: El Gordo's apparent appetite for curbing some of the relaxations to licensing laws. As… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 26 Feb 2008 8:49 AM. There are 1 comments so far. Permalink

Ministry for the Margin of Error

Dave ahead in the North?

The latest Independent/ComRes poll has the Tories comfortably ahead of Labour, at 41% versus 30%. The papers are drooling over one particular aspect of the poll: it puts Dave ahead of El Gordo in the North. By one measly point, but they're taking it as significant (and also arguing that… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 26 Feb 2008 8:43 AM. Permalink

Meedja on the Insanity Pills

Brown's a ditherer...er...we think

ConservativeHome's ToryDiary reckons the Daily Politics Show/Populus Poll showing that 51% of people think that Brown is a dithereris a real kick in the teeth for El Gordo. While gloriously missing the irony that 49% think he isn't. A ditherer, that is. We think. Or not.… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 25 Feb 2008 4:56 PM. Permalink

Behind the Tea Room Curtain

Balls to Anzac

Austin Mitchell's having another good day: Little Liam is determined to show himself tough on immigration. Sadly he can’t do anything about it because all the Eastern Europeans streaming into Warrington to make vodka are free to come in as EU citizens. So he’s determined to bash the Kiwis, Ozzies, Canadians and… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 25 Feb 2008 4:52 PM. Permalink

Ministry for Sweeping Things Under The Rug

Burn down the commission

Facing an overwhelmingly popular backbench bill to give increased rights to agency workers, The Wizard of Gord's got a plan to nip that idea in the bud — send it off to a commission! Westmonster's not certain what's going on behind the curtain, but we're keen to see how the… read more…

Written by Andrew Levy on 25 Feb 2008 9:31 AM. Permalink

Ministry for Watching You

ISPs to be new Info-Stasi

Britain's surveillance society — love it or hate it — has, at the very least, had a plausible justification: the notion that tons of cameras and CCTV might infringe somewhat on privacy, but would keep our streets safer and stop terrorists. Westmonster may not agree with that justification, but at… read more…

Written by Andrew Levy on 22 Feb 2008 11:33 AM. Permalink

Meedja on the Insanity Pills

Telegraph's crisis of confidence

Westmonster interrupts our hangover to bring you this shocking news: Britain apparently has laws to stop minors purchasing alcohol. That's right, it's true, we read it in the Telegraph. The Telegraph editorial puts the binges down to cheap alcohol (going out on a limb there, eh?) but asks whether it's… read more…

Written by Andrew Levy on 22 Feb 2008 9:57 AM. There are 1 comments so far. Permalink

Ministry for Righteous Indignation

Ohh the Lord loves a hangin'

Westmonster's had a hankerin' for some hangerin' since way back in 1964, when the UK last killed one of its own criminals. What better way to get our collective vengeance flowin' agin, jus' like our cousins over there in 'merica? Not to diminish the pain and suffering felt by the… read more…

Written by Andrew Levy on 22 Feb 2008 9:13 AM. There are 1 comments so far. Permalink

Cesspool on the Potomac

McCain bimbo eruption?

Westmonster has a pretty good memory of Bill Clinton's parsing during the Monica Lewinsky scandal. So we read avidly the New York Times' front-page John McCain bimbo/lobbyist eruption story, and the response(s) from McCain's campaign to see what we could read in the tea leaves. From McCain's responses, he thinks… read more…

Written by Andrew Levy on 21 Feb 2008 9:31 AM. Permalink

Ministry for the Margin of Error

Hillary's glass ceiling

Today's Rasmussen Reports US Presidential Tracking Poll contains a nugget of information that shows why Hillary Clinton might very well be screwed, even if she somehow amazingly comes back to defeat Obama for the nomination: "Nationwide, Obama is viewed favorably by 55% and unfavorably by 42%. McCain’s numbers 51% favorable,… read more…

Written by Andrew Levy on 20 Feb 2008 4:52 PM. There are 1 comments so far. Permalink

News from the Carlton Club

Heffer: Tories 'stupid party'

Simon Heffer's sure in a huff. In today's Telegraph, Heffer points the finger squarely at David Cameron and George Osborne for failing to bury Labour in light of Northern Rock, and months of "sleaze, failure, and prevarication" from the government: "Being an opposition is not just about pointing the finger.… read more…

Written by Andrew Levy on 20 Feb 2008 9:47 AM. There are 1 comments so far. Permalink

Cesspool on the Potomac

Oba-meter: February 20th

With the Republican nomination sewn up by John McCain, Westmonster moves its focus to the Democratic competition. We've outlined the 4 things Barack Obama needs to do in order to beat Hillary Clinton — sweep February's post-Super Tuesday contests, make no gaffes, win Ohio or Texas on March 4th, and… read more…

Written by Andrew Levy on 20 Feb 2008 7:37 AM. Permalink

Ministry for Stopping The Presses

Does the gentleman have a Nectar card?

Not to put too fine a point on it, but how many among us can claim we never earned Air Miles on business travel that we later used for a personal flight? That said, Westmonster plans to fully take advantage of the new lower threshold for government scandals, using our… read more…

Written by Andrew Levy on 19 Feb 2008 1:49 PM. Permalink

Ministry for Pulp Fiction

On His Highness' Secret Service

Westmonster offers the following dramatisation with apologies to Ian Fleming and his estate. As M walked into Buckingham Palace on a warm August afternoon, she felt a strange tinge of excitement. She'd not been called there before, and couldn't help but wonder why she had been summoned. This was all… read more…

Written by Andrew Levy on 19 Feb 2008 9:40 AM. Permalink

Cesspool on the Potomac

The Next! Biggest! Primary! (Not.)

One could almost smell the quiet in the US presidential campaign at the weekend, as bad weather put the brakes on campaigning in America's Dairyland state of Wisconsin. Polls put Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton within 5 points in this state that could either (a) cement Obama's frontrunner status heading… read more…

Written by Andrew Levy on 18 Feb 2008 3:51 PM. Permalink

Ministry for Pissing In The Wind

Tories cynical on Rock

Memo to Dave, George, and friends: when you've made considerable hay out of tarring the government with the brush of transparent political cynicism, it's a good idea to steer clear yourselves of transparently cynical political grandstanding. Oops! Too late. Tempted though Alistair Darling may have been to rise to the… read more…

Written by Andrew Levy on 18 Feb 2008 1:05 PM. Permalink

Ministry for Life on Mars

Sailors fighting in the dance hall

My name is Westmonster. I had an accident, and I woke up in 1973. Am I mad, in a coma, or back in time? Whatever's happened, it's like I've landed on a different planet. Now, maybe if I can work out the reason, I can get home. In this week's… read more…

Written by Andrew Levy on 18 Feb 2008 9:29 AM. There are 2 comments so far. Permalink

Cesspool on the Potomac

Oba-meter: February 15th

With the Republican nomination sewn up by John McCain, Westmonster moves its focus to the Democratic competition. We've outlined the 4 things Barack Obama needs to do in order to beat Hillary Clinton — sweep February's remaining contests, make no gaffes, win Ohio or Texas on March 4th, and make… read more…

Written by Andrew Levy on 15 Feb 2008 12:27 PM. There are 1 comments so far. Permalink

All change please

Lee Jasper suspended

A fairly tortuous press release has been released stating the Lee Jasper has asked to be suspended and have all allegations against him referred to the police: The Mayor said: ‘I want to make completely clear the police have made no approach to me to refer these allegations. We are… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 15 Feb 2008 11:19 AM. There are 1 comments so far. Permalink

Meedja on the Insanity Pills

Now, that's entertainment

Anne McElvoy in the Speccie today argues that we are about to be governed by, wait for it, The Jam Generation: What do David Cameron, David Miliband, Nick Clegg, Yvette Cooper, Michael Gove and (just about) George Osborne have in common? They are part of the Jam Generation: a powerful… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 15 Feb 2008 8:30 AM. Permalink

Department for Tax and Spend

Set up a committee

George Osborne's heard the drums on tax, and by God he's doing something about it. Not like Gordon Brown. Oh no. No way would Gordon Brown set up a committee to park an intractable problem. Only the modern, can-do Conservatives can be that direct! And as if that wasn't enough,… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 15 Feb 2008 8:17 AM. Permalink

Behind the Terrace curtain

LibDem sexpots

Sky's annual list of the most fanciable MPs is an shallow, empty waste of time, of course. So we reprint it here: 1. (-) Jeremy Hunt, 41, Conservative, Surrey South West 2. (1) Julie Kirkbride, 47, Conservative, Bromsgrove 3. (-) Julia Goldsworthy, 29, Lib Dem, Falmouth and Cambourne 4. (-)… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 14 Feb 2008 9:34 AM. Permalink

News From The Big Tent

The Peterhouse connection

Some of Westmonster went to Peterhouse in Cambridge, and a more right-wing, masonic, weird place it is hard to imagine. So we were surprised to discover, in the latest of the Telegraph's list of Gordon Brown's biggest influences, that Number 10's two lead press men, Michael Ellam and Damian McBride,… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 14 Feb 2008 9:30 AM. Permalink

Department for Diffrunt People

Turner turns

Immigration = unalloyed economic good, right? Wrong, says Adair Turner: In a paper entitled Do We Need More Immigrants And Babies?, he rejects arguments that without immigrants Britain would face a shortage of workers as mostly "economically illiterate". A stable population is more favourable to well-being, he says. Of course,… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 14 Feb 2008 9:22 AM. Permalink

Out on the Stump

Guppy and cock-ups

Boris Johnson's crime proposals have some serious stuff in them, of course, but you don't want to hear about that, do you? You want to hear about Boris mucking up the running order at his launch (and referring to David Davis as The Home Secretary). You also want to hear… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 14 Feb 2008 9:18 AM. Permalink

Meedja on the Insanity Pills

Whither Kampfner

Why has New Statesman editor John Kampfner left? No-one seems to know: According to one source, Kampfner today finished work on this week's issue, which comes out tomorrow, then went to his office and wrote a message. He is then understood to have spoken to staff, thanking them for their… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 13 Feb 2008 9:45 PM. Permalink

Cesspool on the Potomac

This could do for Clinton

If this doesn't end Hillary Clinton's campaign, nothing will:… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 13 Feb 2008 9:39 PM. Permalink

Cesspool on the Potomac

Clinton's worry: No 'White Bitch Month'?

Westmonster just couldn't let this one go. In Maureen Dowd's otherwise very thoughtful New York Times piece that seeks to explain why Hillary Clinton — as wife of Bill — is not a fair test case for evaluating whether or not America is ready for a woman president, she drops… read more…

Written by Andrew Levy on 13 Feb 2008 3:06 PM. Permalink

Department for Tax and Spend

Balls to the Treasury!

It's been coming for a while, but the gloves are well and truly off for Alistair Darling. The Fleet Street diaspora seems to have flat-out decided that Darling is for the chop, his performance summarised by the Torygraph: Mr Darling has presided over the first run on a high street… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 13 Feb 2008 9:01 AM. Permalink

February 2008 Archives