Contract for acceptable behaviour (unsigned)

Ed Balls' Children Plan, announced today, is a wide-ranging document with lots of good stuff in it (we're assured by people who know about these things). But if Gordon Brown is more Mr Bean than Stalin, it's clear that Balls is quite keen to adopt his own Soviet stylings. Just take a look at some of the thunderous names in the document (warning: may contain tractors). Close your eyes, and dream of Minsk in the winter!

• The Parents Panel
• The Child Health Strategy
• The Staying Safe Action Plan
• Parents Councils
• Every Child a Reader
• The Graduate Leader Fund
• The Future Leaders Programme
• The Youth Task Force
• The Drugs Strategy
• The Children's Workforce Action Plan
• and our favourite: Acceptable Behaviour Contracts (to be awarded at the same time as Antisocial Behaviour Orders, and no we're not making that up)