Media circus ahoy: bloke resigns

An indication of how 24-hour news has enriched all our lives comes with the coverage of Alistair Darling's surprise statement in the House (scheduled for 3.30pm today) and the announcement that the chairman of Revenue and Custons - Paul Gray - has resigned over a rumoured loss of child benefit records.

Do we know anything for certain? Nope. Wanna indulge in wild speculation? Hell yeah!

Moving swiftly, Sky News breathlessly announce that former Chancellor Ken Clarke is in the studio.

Interviewer: Mr Clarke, what do you have for us?

Ken: Uh, I don't know any more than you do.

Interviewer: Oh. [Pause] Want to talk about Northern Rock instead?

Ken: Okay.

Shadow Treasury spokesman Michael Fallon is now on, and being asked whether it would be absolutely outrageous if Gray had been forced to resign because he was - say - caught interferring with puppies. "Why, yes it would, it would be extremely outrageous," comes the obliging answer. "I must stress, I don't know any more than you. But I'm sure it IS serious if it's true. I don't know if it's true, I must stress, but it's bound to be serious."

Still, the puppies of Blighty seem to be safe - it appears the resignation was as a result of something to do with a security breach relating child benefit claimants.

More exciting updates as the Westmonster News Team hears them.

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 20 Nov 2007 1:02 PM. There are 1 comments so far. Permalink