Points, In Order

Polls, rude words, and damsels in distress

BONG! And well he might give the thumbs up: the Labour Party's apparently descended into donation related chaos, and an IPSOS Mori poll confirms the Tories lead and puts them nine percent ahead of the comrades. BONG! Very funny viral email here, courtesy of the Telegraph. C'mon people, it's Friday!… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 30 Nov 2007 6:47 PM. Permalink

Our Friends North of the Border

Wendy Alexander fingered

The Telegraph is reporting that they have proof that Wendy Alexander, the leader of the Scottish Labour Party, was more than aware of the illegal donation from Paul Green in spite of her protestations that she only found out about the personal contribution to her campaign yesterday. Green, a tax exile, is… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 30 Nov 2007 4:33 PM. Permalink

Out on the Stump

Sometimes it's hard ... to be a political activist

"Hello, I'm here from your local Labour Party. Have you got time to answer five, quick questions or do you just want to cut to the chase and shout at me for five minutes about "sleaze" as if I were the last outpost of David Abrahams' office in London, a harangue… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 30 Nov 2007 12:46 PM. Permalink

Ministry for Things We'd Like To Know

Today's YouGov poll

More grim news for the Gord came with the Telegraph's YouGov poll, which put the Tories on 43 (up two) with the comrades on 32 and the LibDems on 14 (both no change). The UK Polling Report sounds a note of caution about getting too Private Fraser ("we're all doomed.… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 30 Nov 2007 12:38 PM. Permalink

Meedja on the Insanity Pills

It's the cleavage, stupid!

As 2008 approaches, it's nice to see feminism blooming so wonderously over on the pages of Femail.… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 30 Nov 2007 11:25 AM. Permalink

While You Were Sleeping

Oh Gord, we're in trouble now

The Dodgy Donor Row is getting unseemly, and somewhat complicated so let's try and do this in some sort of chronological/logical order: Peter Hain's checked his wallet and - who'da thunk it? - nestled between a receipt for Mama Amalfi and one for some extra potent bronzing lotion was one that said,… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 30 Nov 2007 8:59 AM. Permalink

Points, In Order

Brief roundup (Westmonster running late)

BONG! Harriet Harman's still standing after her run-in with Theresa May in Business Questions. Harriet insists she "acted in good faith" and that she would not be, uh, blown down by Ms May. Nurse! The blood pressure tablets. BONG! Another day, another crisis: this time it's Leeds Court. Where tomorrow,… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 29 Nov 2007 5:45 PM. Permalink

Department for Diffrunt People

Rock Stars. Is there anything they DON'T know?

Why oh why can't politicians be more like St Bob of Geldof and the assorted celebs who courageously congregate in fields annually, wearing wristbands in a futile attempt to relaunch their careers to demand social change happens, like, yesterday? Well, largely because the public seems to accept bullshit grandstanding from… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 29 Nov 2007 3:01 PM. There are 2 comments so far. Permalink

Our American Cousins

Shrum use he was

Believe it or not, the gentleman with the arrow growing out of his head (bow before the mighty imaging skills of Westmonster) is none other than Bob Shrum, who was snapped by a reader returning to Blighty from America earlier in the week. Widely heralded as the mastermind behind the… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 29 Nov 2007 2:41 PM. There are 2 comments so far. Permalink

Department for the Tyburn Jig

Mama mia, let me go!

Well, well, well. It seems that the staff at Leeds Crown court have been overly influenced by the bit in Bohemian Rhapsody that comes before the headbanging, and have let a bunch of criminals go. Nice work, boys! After all, they didn't turn up to court, so best just forget… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 29 Nov 2007 2:20 PM. Permalink

Ministry For Finger Pointing

Girls Gone Wild!

Such was the excitement at the scheduled smackdown between Harriet Harman and Theresa May at the Business statement, that here at Westmonster Towers the Colleague consented to turn over from Jeremy Kyle to watch it. The hand of history was briefly on our shoulders. Frivolous frippery first: Theresa May has… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 29 Nov 2007 12:56 PM. There are 1 comments so far. Permalink

Ministry for Madness

A messy Business (statement)

The language our friends in the meedja like to use to create the mood is always a joy. People never express "mild irritation" or "indifference," it's always "FURY!" and likewise, nobody is ever "questioned," they are "grilled." The Gord may well want to grill Harriet Harman (preferably slowly, over a… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 29 Nov 2007 11:00 AM. Permalink

While You Were Sleeping

Notes on a Scandal

The Cowley Street Bedouin asks why leadership hopeful Chris Huhne felt it was his place to report the Gord to the coppers over the dodgy loans affair. Whilst most of us have already answered that one (in an assessment that may or may not contain the words "sanctimonious" and… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 29 Nov 2007 7:43 AM. There are 1 comments so far. Permalink

Points, In Order

The pitfalls of a democratic system

BONG! The Spectator CoffeeHouse and the new Telegraph blog, Three Line Whip, agree that the Gord can't sack Harman even if he wanted to as she was democratically elected by the membership, and it would be up to them to decide whether to remove her. As deputy leader, the Labour… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 28 Nov 2007 5:27 PM. There are 4 comments so far. Permalink

News from the Carlton Club

You Should Not Have Come Back, Gord

Confirmation that the Forces of Darkness (whose earthly manifestation is Tory peer and donor Lord Ashcroft) are behind the Government's recent woes comes from no lesser sage than Ben Brogan: Stepping out of the fray for a moment, I can't help but be impressed by the scale of the operation being run… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 28 Nov 2007 2:45 PM. Permalink

Ministry for Madness

It might have been interesting

A colleague has burst into Westmonster HQ and breathlessly declared that LibDem leadership contender Chris Huhne had "done an Angus MacNeil!" Hurrah! At last, something's happened in this interminable campaign. So, Chris has had to 'fess up to a sordid "heavy petting" session with two winsome teenage lovelies and ... oh. Apparently,… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 28 Nov 2007 2:30 PM. There are 1 comments so far. Permalink

Climbing The Greasy Pole

How the lions are tamed

The Oxford Union inviting along Irving and Griffin to stand and speak on the Hallowed Ground On Which Our Future Overlords Tread has got Grimmer Up North thinking about the past. Inter alia is this remembrance: "Red Andy" Marr, used to sell Socialist Action in the market square and sport… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 28 Nov 2007 1:46 PM. There are 2 comments so far. Permalink

Ministry for Paper Waving

LIVE!: PMQs, 28/11/07

Iain Dale reckons that Cameron slam-dunked it, but here at Westmonster we're not so sure. Yeah, okay so Davy managed a few jibes about Brown's trustworthiness but really, any child with an above room temperature IQ could have managed that today. Maybe he's worried about some hitherto undiscovered logs in… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 28 Nov 2007 11:41 AM. Permalink

News From The Big Tent

Osborne squeaks out the Moody Blues

Osborne has told Labour Party fundraiser that he better go now, go now, go now, over the latter's alleged knowledge of Abrahams funding practices. From Nick Robinson: Well well well. A second senior Labour Party official knew about the secret donations by David Abrahams. Jon Mendelson - who was appointed… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 28 Nov 2007 10:44 AM. Permalink

While You Were Sleeping

David Abrahams has murdered sleep ...

Sorry this is late; Westmonster's got a problem in her ... Actually, no. You don't want to know. Harriet Harman clings on to power after it is revealed that she accepted £5,000 through an intermediary of David Abrahams. But for how long? Last night, and using no lesser mortal divinity… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 28 Nov 2007 10:12 AM. Permalink

Points, In Order

Taking bets on who'll do the Business Statement

BONG! Okay, so seriously - what tomorrow: a plague of locusts perhaps? Warts and boils? The Gord's troubles are truly Biblical, and the latest one is slowly but definitely settling around the actions of Harriet Harman (wife of the Labour Party Treasurer) who stands accused of breaching electoral law by… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 27 Nov 2007 6:02 PM. Permalink

Ministry For Feral Media

The Press Conference Massacre

Well, the Gord came roaring out of the sidings, running over the body of former General Secretary Peter Watt (RIP) in the process. Heh: greater love hath no man man than this, that a man lay down his career for his superiors and take the negative briefing from "senior Labour sources"… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 27 Nov 2007 1:44 PM. There are 1 comments so far. Permalink

News From The Big Tent

Hilary Benn said "no" to Abrahams

Daniel Finkelstein has a question, following the news that a quick Google search later, genial one-time Deputy Leadership candidate Hilary Benn discovered that the money being proffered him by Mr Abrahams through an intermediary wasn't above board: If Mr Benn's campaign knew that there was a link between Kidd and David… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 27 Nov 2007 11:58 AM. Permalink

Meedja on the Insanity Pills

I Can't Believe They Made It A Headline!

Latest stonker from the Telegraph: "Grandmother saved by daughter's poo" The picture is of dancing girls because ... well. You know. The other image choices were too grim to contemplate.… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 27 Nov 2007 11:33 AM. Permalink

Climbing The Greasy Pole

Oxford Union: debate great success

Following angry scenes at the Oxford Union last night, as Holocaust denier David Irving and BNP leader Nick Griffin arrived to address the Prestigious Institution That Contains Our Leaders of Tomorrow, everybody agreed that the entire event had been a "great success." "Basically, it went off like a dream," said… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 27 Nov 2007 10:17 AM. Permalink

While You Were Sleeping

Watt's the Story, Morning Glory

Of course the resignation (submitted by or done to, scratch one according to theory) of Labour's General Secretary Peter Watt over a donation scandal of Enron-style complexity is the main story this morning. From the comrades, Chris Paul thinks it regrettable but inevitable that he should go, Guido of… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 27 Nov 2007 9:57 AM. Permalink

Points, In Order

Rocking (ahem) the boat

BONG! Hopi Sen analyses the balanced media coverage of the Northern Rock saga. BONG! All together now: Labour's in the money! It's in the money! It's got a lot of what it takes to get in trouble with the Electoral Commission!… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 26 Nov 2007 5:47 PM. Permalink

Don't Look Ethel!

A rift in the Union

The Oxford Union event on free speech, to which Holocaust denier David Irving and BNP leader Nick Griffin have been invited to start channelling Voltaire, has produced much comment on the blogosphere and beyond. James Forsyth in the Spectator draws the distinction between the freedom of speech which is a… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 26 Nov 2007 2:45 PM. Permalink

Department for Tax and Spend

The Gord to Cameron: I ain't going nowhere, kiddo

Well, the Gord's delivered his speech to the CBI and a media who could barely contain their indifference. Kevin Maguire reckons that the address owed more to "perspiration than inspiration," and the Times highlighted Brown's apparent belief that his recent wibbling in the polls is merely a "short-term fluctuation." And… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 26 Nov 2007 1:41 PM. Permalink

Department for Tax and Spend

CBI speeches: the battle continues

In (another) attempt to Recapture The Political Initiative, the Gord is using his speech to the CBI to set out his long-term agenda on climate change, economic stability, and ... oh come on, you know the words to this one - sing along! Davy Cameron's predicted to hit back in… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 26 Nov 2007 10:25 AM. Permalink

Meedja on the Insanity Pills

The hidden poverty in Brown's Britain

As Christmas approaches and the shopping horror commences, we would like all Westmonster readers to contemplate for one moment those who will not be spending time being jolly this holiday season: "Desperate families pay up to £500 for Nintendo Wii on internet." Personally, we think the Gord should set up a… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 26 Nov 2007 9:54 AM. Permalink

While You Were Sleeping

"I go away for a couple of days ..."

Imagine the scene. You're a Prime Minister who has to leave the country to partake of tea, cucumber sandwiches, and pointless diplomacy with Brenda in Africa for a week. You leave a "to do" list pinned to the fridge, a list of emergency numbers by the phone, and stress to Alan Johnson… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 26 Nov 2007 9:31 AM. Permalink

Ministry for Administrative Affairs

The marathon continues

Is it just us, or has this been the longest Parliamentary year ever? The only thing keeping the Westmonster team going is regular injections of gin straight into the eyeball. Anyway, here we go again: Oral PQs Monday - Home Office Tuesday - Communities and Local Government Wednesday - Scotland;… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 25 Nov 2007 3:43 PM. Permalink

Department for Kite Flying

When shall we three meet again?

The Sundays are a bit of a mixed bag this morning. Obviously Diskgate continues to get commentary but seeing as everyone's getting a bit fed up with "Killer Disks Still At Large: No Change Here Folks" style headlines, perhaps it would be more interesting to look at the effect the… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 25 Nov 2007 11:04 AM. Permalink

Points, In Order

Fightback!

BONG! This morning, various generals discovered they had a conscience and wanted to take over the running of our great nation. This Fight for What Is Right required them, somewhat coveniently, to forget any role they had played in the situations they are now complaining about and pipe up only after they'd made… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 23 Nov 2007 5:55 PM. Permalink

Ministry For Finger Pointing

Backlash!

Shocking news from ConservativeHome that Home Secretary Jacqui Smith is ... a law-breaker! Why? Because her Department when she was Minister for Women appointed someone who turned out to be in possession of lady-bits rather than the required testicles. For shame. We demand an independent inquiry! In his article, Rob… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 23 Nov 2007 2:03 PM. Permalink

Department for Wonkery

Direction for the democratic left

Compass supremo Neal Lawson's continuing disappointment that his past cheerleading for the Gord hasn't resulted in an invitation to come inside the Big Tent is played out (again) on the web pages of Comment is Free. … read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 23 Nov 2007 2:01 PM. Permalink

Department for Waiting Lists

Feeling festive, people?

Jingle bells, jingle bells! Rejoice, for the Annual Panic over the yet-to-happen flu pandemic is in its early stages, which means that Christmas is juuust around the corner. From the Guardian: The health secretary, Alan Johnson, yesterday announced a dramatic increase in plans to combat pandemic flu, committing the government… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 23 Nov 2007 1:01 PM. There are 2 comments so far. Permalink

News from the United Federation of Muesli Knitters

Lies, damned lies, and opinion polls?

As the end nears in the interminable Liberal Democrat leadership contest and voting for the Parliamentary equivalent of Head of Year 7 continues, the Guardian releases a poll that shows Huhne catching up: Forty per cent of just over 200 Lib Dems questioned by the Guardian after a hustings in Cambridge… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 23 Nov 2007 12:01 PM. Permalink

Climbing The Greasy Pole

Blogger battles: Recess Monkey apologises

Alex Hilton (of Recess Monkey fame) has apologised to Nadine Dorries MP for committing crimes against Facebook. Ministry of Truth has the back story. UPDATE: Apologies all, Alex has just pointed out that he apologised to Dorries' daughter rather than her.… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 23 Nov 2007 11:10 AM. Permalink

Department for Expanding the British Museum

Is this a coup?

Ben Brogan certainly thinks so. No sooner had the Gord left for Uganda than a selection of military gentlemen with startling sounding names like Lord Humphrey-Montmorency III start popping up on the Today Programme to declare martial law outline their concerns at Government policy in Iraq. Apparently, the fact that Defence… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 23 Nov 2007 10:42 AM. There are 1 comments so far. Permalink

While You Were Sleeping

While the cat's away ...

Military blokes use the opportunity of the Gord's absence (he's in Uganda) to aim some bitchslapping at the Government. Classy work, boys. More damning, perhaps, is the National Audit Office report regarding the undreamed of wealth made by ten civil servants at the public expense. At the end of… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 23 Nov 2007 10:07 AM. Permalink

Points, In Order

Sorry, we lost the thrills and spills in the post

BONG! As the members start casting their votes, John Redwood discovers something shocking: clear, er, yellow water between the two Lib Dem leadership contenders. Well, who'da thunk it? BONG! Diskgate continues, as copies of emails from HMRC are released to the press hounds. The spin now is that it was budgetary… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 22 Nov 2007 6:14 PM. Permalink

Our Friends North of the Border

He's gonna do politics HIS way!

Fraser Nelson's got an interesting interview with Alex Salmond (Scotland's answer to Judge John Deed - he's a maverick, doncha know) in this week's Spectator. Inter alia, it's revealed that Alex quite wants the Tories to win the next election as there's more chance of the SNP winning a referendum on independence… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 22 Nov 2007 5:10 PM. Permalink

Department for Silly Lists

Who Do You Think You Are Kidding Mr Cameron?

We've had quick squiz over what is loosely referred to here at Westmonster as our "reporting" over the past week, and have been shocked at the high volume of Government-in-the-brown-stuff style stories. Lest it be doubted - we believe that this administration is just the sort of very-British crack-squad that this country needs to… read more…

Written by Lloyd Shepherd on 22 Nov 2007 4:57 PM. There are 2 comments so far. Permalink

November 2007 Archives